Friday, April 15, 2011

CONTEST- Book Giveaway for Him!

CONTEST NOW CLOSED.

Congratulations to our winners!
Cassidy said...
I said this to my husband yesterday - don't tell me not to cry over my period until you've had a period before.' I wasn't happy with him at all!!!!
Bella said...
Hubby said - at least we have a cute dog. Not a good thing to say to your wife after a BFN.
Please contact me at infertilenaomi@gmail.com to claim your prize.



ENTER TO WIN!
Enter to win a copy of the new book, What He Can Expect When She's Not Expecting: How to Support Your Wife, Save Your Marriage, and Conquer Infertility!


HOW TO ENTERLeave a comment below with the following information:

  1. Include your first name only (real or at least a good fake name).
  2. Tell us one thing you shouldn't say to your fertility-challenged wife/partner.
  3. Two lucky winners will be randomly chosen on April 24, 2011.

68 comments:

  1. I am Brianna. one thing you should not say to your fertility challenged spouse is "just relax and it will happen." i am so lucky to have a great husband that knows what to say and what not to say!

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  2. He should never say that he can see us without kids and going on with our lives. It makes it seem like he has given up the fight.

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  3. My name is Lindsay. The one thing I don't want to hear from my husband is "Was that a mood swing?"

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  4. My name is tara, one thing you should not say to your fertility challenged partner is "if we don't have kids it will be ok" I am lucky to have an amazing husband who supports me every day, one pill or shot at a time!!

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  5. I am Samantha and he should never say, adoption is always an option, when he has also said in the past, "I hope someday our baby looks just as beautiful as you!" *sigh

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  6. One thing you shouldn't say to your fertility challenged partner is "Stop paging Dr. Google already, I'll happen!!" My Husband knows better!

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  7. My name is Ashley. What Hubs wishes he'd never said: "So what if (fill in the blank) is pregnant. I don't know why you can't just be happy for them and have to have a hissy fit."

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  8. My name is Amy and my husband recently said "Maybe now that we have some control over when we get pregnant we could just wait a couple years and get more financially established first." Three weeks before our first IUI cycle and after 5 years of infertility. Really? As if this is a for sure that it is going work? Sure, lets just put it off for a few more years till I'm 35 and my eggs are old. *please notice the sarcasm, lol.

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  9. My name is Priscilla...one thing I don't like to hear from my husband is to stop being so emotional or negative that it won't happen. I suppose he is trying to be encouraging in his own way but sometimes I just need him to give me a hug and let me have a good cry.

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  10. My name is Jessica. One thing you should def. not say is, "it's just one month." Well actually, it is more than one month, if you were counting correctly, it has been 12.

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  11. My name is Nancy and he should never say, "Why are you so upset? It's just an invitation to a stupid baby shower." Ughhh... Why don't they get it?

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  12. One thing my husband said during my last IVF cycle is that needles make him nervous--like, really honey, you think I like them? Besides, they're getting jabbed in my @ss, not yours! I must say he was a trooper though, and gave me my shots when I needed him to.

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  13. Name is Christine. Should not say 'just relax honey and it'll happen'

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  14. Rebecca here. One thing male partners should definitely not complain about is the fact that they have to "provide a sample!" I mean, seriously, I go through weeks of mood swings, injections, bloating, pain, uncomfortable probing, anxiety, etc. and you complain that you have to do one (not entirely unpleasant) thing?!

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  15. My name is Cassidy and one thing you should never say to your fertility challenged wife is "stop crying." Hello DH I can't actually control these tears it's the hormones!

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  16. Name is Kiera, one thing a spouse should not say is " well guess we should try a different hole since that one isnt working" Yeah he learned after that!

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  17. My name is Christina, one thing a spouse shouldn't say is "Well if we don't have any kids at least we have the cats." Yeah that doesn't work for me.

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  18. He should never say: How about we just give up and have no kids, wouldn't that be just fine?

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  19. My name is Andrea and one thing you shouldnt say to a fertility challenged partner is that sex is boring when your trying to make a baby.

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  20. He should never say, "Stop thinking about it so much."

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  21. My name is Shannon, One thing my husband should not say to me is " Maybe God knows we wouldn't be good parents and he doesn't want us to have kids ever" That comment shuts me totally down and makes me feel like a failure in every way! Thanks for entering me into the contest!!!

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  22. "Hey, you haven't cried yet today. So since you're feeling better can we get ice cream". Said my DH last night.

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  23. My name is Alicia and something my husband should never say to me is "Don't you think you are being shallow for not wanting to spend the weekend with someone just because they're pregnant and you aren't?"

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  24. My name is Kaitake, and I really think it's a bad idea on my husbands part when he starts talking about his ex-wife's pregnancies!

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  25. My name is Ashley. The thing my husband said to me that he knows now to never to say again, "maybe you aren't charting right". Alright smarty, next month you pee on the damn sticks and temp every morning at 5:30.

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  26. Jennifer
    He should never say "I don't understand. With my ex-wife it only took having sex to get pregnant 5 times and have 3 kids". Yup that's right... that's what my husband said to me in the beginning of our infertility journey. Now he's a better but still has his insensitive moments. Men! :)

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  27. My name is Annabelle, and he should not say "You're an emotional wreak!" Sorry but that's the last thing my emotional self wants to hear, just hold me and shut up!

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  28. My name is Heather - Whining about having to *ahem* into a cup for his part of all this (meanwhile I get the dildo cam, drugs, poked, prodded, scraped, biopsied, and more blood work). I am lucky he's only whined about that once, and is pretty awesome otherwise.

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  29. Christina

    After having a successful SA, a husband should never say "I'm glad it's not my fault!"

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  30. Hiya, I'm Lynsey and one of the things I think that your hubby should not complain about is having to 'do the deed' in a cup a few times (this is one of the main things they have had a lot experience and training in!) AND then having the results back as being good and saying "well at least I know it's not my fault then"!!

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  31. My name is Anne... and the one thing I don't recomend husbands say, "honey, the picture didn't save... can we go back in and do it again?" Joking or not, after having needles and dye put in places you don't ever want to think of them going... that is not a cool comment, espicially when I'm already being tolerable that you took the picture of my ovaries and tubes on your phone in the first place... And yes, my husband was dumb enough to do this and then called a good friend and complained that he didn't save the picture like he thought he had... Looking back its kinda funny, in that moment I wanted nothing more than to knock him out and let him take the pain like a woman...

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  32. ~kboo
    After another failed month, don't say, "Well, that's good, I wanted a 'Dragon' baby anyway... can we wait 6 more months?" I'm like, um, dear, we are not Chinese!

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  33. My nickname is Scary.

    A husband should not say "are you sure you're not pregnant, you look kind of fat"?

    Ouch, double whammy.

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  34. Hey there.....My name is Stephanie and the one thing that a husband should never say is that there is nothing wrong with it just being the two of us. We could have just as much fun if we didn't have a child. Very frustrating to to say the least as both of my siblings have kids and for me to not even to have had one successful pregnancy let alone any at all(and I am going to be 36 next month) makes me feel like the black sheep of the family.

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  35. My name is Laura. I wish he wouldn't say "we can always adopt". I know that's definitely an option for our future, but gosh darnit! I want to experience my babies lives from literally Day 1.

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  36. My name is Susan. My husband likes to say, "We still have each other. Why isn't that enough?" Um, let me count the ways.

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  37. My name is Christine. My husband frequently says "It will happen when it is meant to happen." It doesn't just work like that, don't you realize?

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  38. My name is Tania. If my husband tells me to relax one more time, I'm gonna deck him!

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  39. My name is Maelyn, my husband tells me "you should watch what you eat...you might gain weight" when I am on day 8 of stims for IVF. UGG really... I am stabbing myself 3 times a day with needles, I think I deserve to eat what I want!

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  40. My name is Erin and a husband should never say "but honey at least we found out I have super sperm"

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  41. Name's Cheri. :) During treatment my husband CONSTANTLY asks me, "How do you feel?"....well honey, about the same as when you asked me FIVE minutes ago!! He stresses me out just by asking over and over again. How do you THINK I feel. I'm bloated, I'm driving an hour a day on my lunch break to the clinic, getting blood drawn and a dildo cam, then back to work, where I'll likely stay late to make up the extra time I took at lunch. Once I get home, I get to give myself 2 shots. Rinse, repeat!

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  42. My name is Michelle and The one thing that he should not say is... "Is it that time of the month again???" Yes of course i'm pissed off by AF I'm still not pregnant!

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  43. My name is Ashlee and the one thing he shouldn't say is "at least we know that my sperm aren't the problem." Yah- thanks honey for reminding me that I am 100% responsible for our baby-less-ness.

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  44. Hi my name is Sweetie,
    This week I started taking femara, which made me pretty sick and more than a little moody. The day that I finished taking the pills I had to have an HSG, which was kinda painful and the cramping lasted all day and night, my hubby says to me... "your done taking the pills, doesn't that mean you should be done with your mood swings and anger?" umm nope not really... but my favorite is "just suck it up!" I get that one pretty much daily...

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  45. as most women struggling with infertility know, as time goes on you feel like less and less of a women..... as i was trying to explain my feelings to my husband he says to me.... "what do you think that i think you are?.... just a juicy hole?" now that would instantly make an infertile feel more feminine any day of the week!!! As disgusting as it sounded at the time, we get a good laugh out of it now!!!

    Leslie S.

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  46. Christine W.



    "I don't see what the big deal is it's not my fault"

    Real heartbreaker <\3

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  47. Alicia B.

    "Are you sure that's not the hormones talking?" Probably yes, but now they're going to speak a lot louder! ;)

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  48. My husband came out with "just stop thinking about it" the other day. stop thinking when? when I'm taking my herbs twice a day? when I'm being poked by an acupuncturist once a week? when I'm taking my temp in the morning? when I'm counting the days to AF? when I'm reminding him to take his herbs & supplements? yeah great advice! god bless him he does try though

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  49. My name is Jennifer. My something that dh says actually happened today. After 10 years of trying (IVF and all), my husband said (with the pitying look in his eyes), maybe we should start saving up for adoption. or I don't like adoption but if it will keep you from being sad all the time.

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  50. My name is Jeani. The one thing that my dh says when I get in a "IF pity party" mood is "you really need to take your hormones!"

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  51. Name is Kari M. My husband always tells me after I'm crying over my period..'can we discuss this after my show is over.'

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  52. my name is Jessica H. my husband always has said well if it happens it happend if it dont it dont... im like really thats what you are going to say!

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  53. My name is Jamie (Jamielynn77 on here). My husband had been chatting with his mom on webcam while I was at work. When I got home he said, "My mom read an article about how cell phones might have an affect on sperm. She suggested that I stop carrying my phone in my pocket (which wasn't very often) and that we should wait to do IVF to see if it makes a difference (after we had already saved the money and were about a month away from treatment). What do you think if I tried it and we wait a few more months for IVF?" Um no thanks.

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  54. My name is Alli. My hubby and I have been TTC for nearly 3 years with no luck. Normally he's extremely supportive, but one thing he says that dives me crazy is telling me to stop stressing about it. Urgh!!

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  55. My name is Randi. My husband is super sweet and supportive, but when he makes reference to my raging hormones (apparently I'm a bit crabby, lol), it makes me want to punch a hole through a wall ;)

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  56. My name is Melia and the one thing you shouldn't say to your fertility challenged wife is to "just don't think about it" others have said it, and it's just not possible!

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  57. I said this to my husband yesterday - don't tell me not to cry over my period until you've had a period before.' I wasn't happy with him at all!!!!

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  58. My name is Abby and one thing my hubby should never do is complain about taking all of the vitamins and supplements he takes (which actually HAVE really improved his sperm count....enough that we conceived naturally a few months ago...only to have it end in miscarriage...sigh).

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  59. My Name is Annie and what my hubby should never say again... Yes he said it once waaaay back before we knew how bad the problem was. "We always have our nephews and niece to spoil!!" Gee thanks Hubbs I hadn't thought about how fertile our sisters are before!!...

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  60. My name is Jane and one thing a husband shouldn't say to his fertility-challenged partner is, "You got your period? Babe, just look on the bright side, we get to DO IT a whole lot again next month!!"

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  61. Ivy:
    IVF? You might as well go to Vegas and drop $14,000 on red!

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  62. My name is Darla. Don't ever tell me to get a puppy instead. No, I don't want an F-ing puppy!

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  63. My Name is Lorie. The worst thing my husband has said to me was: "Awww, sweetie, you're so cranky. What's the matter, are you PMS-ing?" The worst part is he was being SINCERE!!!

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  64. My name is Mariah....My husband is always super supportive, but when we found out we couldn't be parents naturally he brought home a puppy and said I know you want something to take care of and love...so now we have 3 furbabies...awesome.

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  65. My name is Jen...
    When I am kicking the bathroom door closed because I have started yet another period, my hubbie should not say, "You should be used to it by now, you have been getting your period since you were 13." Hey honey, getting my period is not what bothers me, it is not getting pregnant.

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  66. Shauna's the name and infertility is lame!
    Never EVER say to me: "It's God's will." While I realize that may be a comfort for some people - not everyone believes in God and those that do wonder why God would "will" this on anyone!

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  67. This is Mar, what not to say to your fertile challenged spouse is "Stop getting on those infertility blogs, they make you more obsessive."

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  68. Hubby said - at least we have a cute dog. Not a good thing to say to your wife after a BFN.

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